THE JOURNAL // 3"Well, Andrew Connor Malone,” I whispered to myself, “Let’s find out who you are. I placed the book squarely in front of me and opened the book,
My English Literature teacher suggested I write a journal, he said I was a good writer; Iam just “in want of practice,” he told me in his stuffy British accent. I said “okay Mr. Whitewood.” and went home. I totally forgot about it until today when he said, “How is the journal coming along, Andrew?” as I was packing my books. “Uh.. journal. It's fine,” I mumbled, he smiled thinly and pulled a package out of his desk and handed it to me. “You know,” he said as I opened it, “journaling is not only for girls. Most famous writers kept one some time. As do I. It helps me think.” He said, tapping his forehead. “Try it.” He told me, “If only for a few days.”
So here I am. Trying it. This is my first entry in my uneventful life. Nothing spectacular happened today (SURPRISE!) so this is where this entry ends. We’ll see how this goes. -ASeptember 21
Dad insisted I come to a business meeting with him today, although it was a Saturday and I kind of had some plans. He said it was to “prepare me for things to come.” I still can’t manage to make him realize I do not want to go to business, or law, or engineering school. The problem is I can’t find a reasonable solution. I can say, “I don’t want to go do that” all day long. But dad wants to know what it is that I do want to do. Me too. I dislike sports, even though I’m pretty good at all of them, hate politics, would really rather die before I become the CEO of some money loving business. If my mom was still alive, she’d agree with me. Dad would listen to her. I guess since I only have 1 1/2 years until I have to find my ambition, I had better hurry up. Until I do, I’m just going to focus on school and writing. I guess.September 23
Enough of that now, it’s almost midnight. -A
Last night I had a dream. “Wow, that’s amazing Andy, I’m so glad you are here to write about the important on goings of your dream state...” (I guess I should mention that no one EVER calls me Andy, only my annoying and abusive alter ego. Say hello abusive alter ego.) Anyway, yes I had a dream, in this dream my father stepped down and I became president/owner or what ever it’s called of Malone banks. I was in charge of millions, lived in a “posh” upper-class mansion, never had to do a day of hard work and I hated it. All around me people expected perfection, they wanted facts, figures, and I had no idea what was going on. I went from day to day without any hope of freedom. I was trapped like a bird in a cage. I woke in a cold sweat. Weird the things that haunt my nightmares. I know people expect rich kids to love being pampered and looked after, free from the normal things of life. But the fact is all I really want to do is be normal. Well, as normal as any human 16 and a half year old guy can be. And maybe I don’t even want that, I’m not looking for the kind of stuff guys my age think they want, a girlfriend, popularity, things that make your otherwise perfectly sound brain useless. But I guess I just want people, my dad, to appreciate me for who I am, what I want to do, my interests. Is it really too much to ask? I don’t know; it seems fairly reasonable to my thinking. Oh well, enough of that, I need to stop writing about how terrible my life is, because really it’s not! Dad isn’t even hard to live with, I love him more than anything else, so I guess I should write like it. I don’t want to look back on this book and have it be a big downer. Something I’ll look back on with a kind of regret. So I’ll have to find something else to write about.
Gosh, I just realized how weird it would be if someone read my journal... I need to do something about that. Okay, I just inscribed my name on the title page and wrote beside it, “READ NO FURTHER” people always obey signs, right? RIGHT? I sure hope so because now I’m paranoid. Hm. Anyway, dad just got home and I should go greet him. -A
“Elly! Turn your light out and go to bed!” My mother said as she opened my door, startling me into thrusting the book onto the floor. She walked over and picked it up, “Where did you get this?” She asked, fingering the leather and flipping through the first pages. “I found it today in one of the houses.” I said, she raised her eyebrow and handed it back to me. “This is someone’s private property, you know. They probably wouldn’t want you reading it.” I said, “I know, I just... can we put an add out in the paper for it in the morning?” She smiled, her nose wrinkling up as she did, “I think that would be best, don’t you? Whose is it, by the way? I didn’t read the inscription.” “Malone.” She looked surprised. “Now, that should be interesting. Too bad we shouldn’t read it.” I giggled, “Oh come on, mom. Just a little bit?” I put two fingers together to show her how little we would read, then squinted to make my point clear. She laughed and kissed the top of my head, “Do what’s right.” She said, then walked out of the room and closed the door. “Go to sleep!” She said. I smiled to myself and reopened the book, I smoothed the page that was crinkled when it fell, “What’s right...” I whispered, sighed and closed the book. “I sleep on it.” I said out loud, then set the book on my shelf, pulled my covers up around my arms and turned off my light.
© Johanna Grace
Hello. I am now 16 years old you guys! Thank you all so much for the kind and encouraging notes on my last post! They meant so much to me, you made my day!
You've most likely realized that we only have a tiny bit of time left in the month of June and that Sunday is the 1st of July. GUYS. JULY! This means the launch of the new design and all the fancy stuff I have planned... Excited I am. I most likely will not have it up until the second week of July however because I'm spending the week at my grandparents, so I'm going to be MIA. Maybe, I know for sure that I will not have the design up because everything is on my home computer. I really could use a laptop right about now. But I will get it up! And it is going to be so amazing... For real you guys. Super fantastic stuff!